About two years ago, I said I would “finish” this blog. But no matter how many posts I write up, the pile of unwritten posts annoyingly never goes down. There is always about 100 left to write. The more I write and explore, the more keep coming to my mind.
So I am going to STOP. The unwritten stuff will go in the bin. And my mind will be freed up of its incessant whirring and writing (I hope).
It’s time for me to practise what I preach, be the change I want to see in the world, and disconnect from the internet. Or at least be on it a lot lot less. One day I hope to completely disconnect.
Giving up my blog feels like when I slowly gave up alcohol. Sometimes I think, “maybe just one more post…”. (like “just one more drink”). I am now able to throw away my notes instead of clinging onto them as valuable, just as I once became able to throw away a half drunk bottle of unwanted wine down the sink, thereby devaluing it. The supply of material to write about is as endless as the supply of alcohol in the shops.
It’s a reminder for me that literacy is a cultural addiction too, force fed to children from young, used to numb and dumb us, and control us.
Thanks to all those who have shared the journey over the last 6 years since I began. Having companions along the way, albeit electronic ones, has helped me stay sane in this mad world… it is probably why we are all driven online in the first place.
Nothing is proven, nothing is certain. Even some things I once wrote myself I am now not so sure about. It is all a journey of exploration.
The blog will remain open for comments for the time being, and I will attend to them as and when I can.
Thank you for this blog!
Thanks for the appreciation.
Thank you from me too. You’ve provided some interesting food for thought and I shall miss it.
Thanks Noo, I sort of miss it too.
Interesting you should say “food”, maybe it is like closing down a cafe.
I think you’re write to stop righting when you feel like it. We are living creatures in a living world; the most unfathomable mystery of all; and we focus our attention on abstractions postulated by our minds. A living mouth speaks words to living ears and it’s difficult to know if written words are a voice of the living being or just the calculations of it’s mind. You’ll just start writing again when it happens, you’re a natural,be true to your nature. See you later, Scraypes.
Thanks Scraypes, and thanks for the company. I may or may not write again. Who knows?
At the moment I am experimenting with writing very little, and seeing what happens. Thus all my thoughts are transmitted verbally, or telepathically, or by my actions, or held in my head. I am finding it an excellent discipline for only hanging onto the really important thoughts. Like having a good clearout of junk. I think it sharpens memory recall, and enforces better organisation of the mind, and maybe above all else, enforces policing of new junk coming in !
I am coming to think of the practice of “Writing Things Down”, as memory loss. It could be the cause of it. Both are on the increase in our society.
You will be missed. I liked reading your ideas. I didn’t reply because 2018 is being brutal with me, both healthwise and financially.
Every time I attempt to clear out my mind junk I either find life unbearably boring and I have to go find some junk or I find some junk that is just irresistable and I never clear out my mind. Still, my Mars story is growing nicely.
I hope life goes well for you and thanks for all the interesting articles, they have given me plenty to think about.
Yes I know that boring feeling too. And as you say, the junk then tempts you in to fill the gap of boredom, to be amused and entertained and distracted. Over Boredom can make me as ill as over busyness.
Coincidentally, there are BORING insects like woodworm, and BUSY insects like ants and bees. And insects are like in-sex, in-sects, incest. Never got around to writing that post, will leave it up to readers to explore it further themselves ! (check out the word HYMENoptera, sounds like a hymen breaking hymn, or operation, or opera tragedy).
Someone said “Life is a waiting room for death”. We are constantly tackling boredom. Though only in the western world !
I find if I have to do more of my own jobs, such as fetching water, (African women must be stopped from doing this!), making fires, picking or growing my own food, I am a lot less bored and a lot less busy, and a lot less in the money system, and more fulfilled. The key to me is to be nearly always slightly busy with purposeful things, slowly paced, always with time to stop for a chat or to help someone passing by, as they help me too. I also need to interact with other people, serve others, and be out of my own home. I like to just sit, at least once a day if I can, and contemplate.
I also find being slowly on the move is my main purpose, either walking (wandering) or moving my boat. Being too fixed is soul destroying for me, stagnant.
I still consume plenty of junk, as food, and as reading material, but less so than I did. Impossible to religiously boycott things. Real lasting change is a very slow process. I feel fortunate at this moment in my life to be in a position to effect some real changes, and try out new ways of living, not everyone is.
Hope your health and finances pick up before too long, funny how they go hand in hand, we often talk about “financial health”. But maybe the difficulties will lead on to something new.
Thank you very much for your reply. My health has improved, except I am a tad too fat.
For me, things have gone the other way. I now have a BMW and I love it. My son says I drive too fast, but the freedom it brings me is amazing. Before I got the bus everywhere, but they got expensive, dirty and slow. The final straw was when a person was bothering me. I think he had mental health issues.
I get more and more mechanised. I have dishwasher, which saves me time and means I don’t have to spend ages at the sink getting wet. I found washing up time consuming and depressing. My kitchen is minute but there are 4 people at home + 2 cats and 4 goldfish.
I am just going to go along with it. My machines help me, like my dicer and I get things done faster as I do most of the work at home so it’s essential to do it fast. Also I find that the machines do things better than me.
At the moment I don’t have too much interaction with others, but I hope to go to work, so that might help.
I guess you could say my life has speeded up and I am fine with that. I still think about all the things I have read on your blog. All the best.
Nice to hear from you, Claire, and hear about your change in lifestyle. Mine is changing too. I have learnt not to pass judgement on anyone and their ways. (another unwritten post about Judgement Day being when you come to judge only yourself, not others, because how does anyone else know what it is like to be in your shoes?).
From getting to know you through the Screens, I know that you carry a huge burden of care on your shoulders, something that is largely hidden from view, behind the scenes. Something that most people tend to avoid taking on, there is always the easy option to run away from it, or shut up the cared for person in a “care home” (though I cannot judge anyone for choosing that either). There is not enough care to go round, in my opinion.
I have found that it is impossible to escape from the modern world we live in. I have recently decided I will get a car, reluctantly, in order to avoid myself breaking down, trying to be in too many places at once to meet all the demands of my family and the State (i.e. money and taxes). Difficult though it is,i am determined to look after my mother and ensure that she has a quality of life worth having, this overrides other principles in my life (such as hating cars).
Funny what you say about going to work, because on the face of it, that is another exhaustion for me, but I always feel better from getting out of my own family problems for a day, being valued enough to be paid for it, and the social interaction that goes with it. I work in catering, there is no way we could produce what we do at affordable prices without machines (like your home kitchen).
I like to remain aware of the Earth/humanity destruction that is involved in the choices that I make in my life, but on balance believe that the destruction would be worse by other choices, such as abandoning my mother (or my family) when she needs me most.
Sometimes surrendering to the world around us is better than resisting, maybe always better ? Resisting, resistance, or protesting, protestants, creates conflict within and without. I sometimes wish I was blissfully ignorant of how it all works. To go along with the masses is to be joined with others, to share the journey. Being good, noble, heroic, Superiority Complex never works. We are all in this together, even Donald Trump.
Fain would I wake the sleeping goddess, but…… if you do occasionally peek into the sticky folds of the web, the psalmistice has antimony to offer. It’s the only blog I can now be bothered to reply to. Miss you, Scraypes. Hmm Miss You…. good title for a popsong, oh dear I can’t stop! Don’t bother to post this~ unmoderate it. Hell, it would have to be Ms You now wouldn’t it!
Due to great modern technology that saves us all so much time, it has taken me about an hour to get through all the pain barriers to moderate your comment ! I cannot logon to my own blog ! A reminder to me that getting off the internet is the way for me.
But good to hear from you anyway…